“I went out and told the woman what a rum punch was and how to make it. In a few minutes a girl brought a stone pitcher, steaming, into the room. Bill came over from the piano and we drank the hot punch and listened to the wind.
“There isn’t too much rum in that.”
I went over to the cupboard and brought the rum bottle and poured a half-tumblerful into the pitcher.
“Direct action,” said Bill. “It beats legislation.”
The Sun Also Rises

- Get a big-ass crock pot.
- Pour in some apple cider.
- Add three cinnamon sticks. Break them up. It’s fun, sort of like knocking a battery off a man’s shoulder.
- Shove some cloves into orange. Think about sex with Martha Stewart.
- Cut up the orange and fling it in.
- Add some lime juice and some pineapple juice.
- Heat it all up to make your house smell happy.
- Pour two big-ass dollops of rum into Ball jars or that beer glass you stole from Applebees because you are so crazy.
- Pour the mix over.
- Call your mom.


will foolow these instructions tonight. except # 10.